Notes to Grandchildren – January 25, 2020

Dear Grandchildren,

People chase after things just like your dog chases after her football or Frisbee.

• Clothes with a particular logo.
• This car with all the bells and whistles.
• A new toy.
• A visit to the Mouse Kingdom or an African safari.
• A bigger house.
• The list goes on … and on … and on.

What do they really get?

Happiness and contentment reside within.  None of these finds provide either.

Seek a happy life.  Cultivate contentment.  Choose satisfaction.  You’ll have a better life.  These things you control.  Don’t chase after things outside your control.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 24, 2020

Dear Grandchildren,

Look beyond.  Don’t just accept what people say … what is written … what you see.  Be cautious.  Things may not be as they seem.

People call me gullible.  I tend to believe that people are credible until proven otherwise.  Consequently, I have fallen for some outrageous stories in my 70+ years.  Sometimes it has been an expensive lesson.

Social media has not helped. People today seem to only read or listen to stories consistent with their beliefs.  Don’t be that person.  Listen to everything and make up your own mind.

I remember at a recent baby shower two great-aunts were sitting side-by-side at the table.  Fortunately, no one mentioned politics.  One great aunt believes the President can do no wrong while the other believes he can do no right.  Sadly, from what each post on social media, that is all that they tend to read.

Personally, I confuse people.  I follow people all across the spectrum.  I want to hear what others have to say.  I want to take in information and make up my own mind.  I have people believing that I am in their camp when I’m not.  I have people believing that I oppose their point of view when I don’t.

I’m not a zealot.  I’m not out to convert the world to my point of view.  (The world would be a boring place if everyone believed and acted the same way.)  I am, however, tolerant to other religions, political views, and beliefs.

So, listen, read, and look carefully.  Gather different information.  Make up your own mind.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 23, 2020

Dear Grandchildren,

Happiness comes from within. It’s not what you have — money, possessions, what not.

Helen Keller said, “Your success and happiness lies within you.  Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.”

So …according to the song by Bobby McFerrin — “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.”

Love,

Grandfather

P.S.  Grandson:  I picked you up from elementary school today.  No mix-ups like yesterday when Grandfather went to the red cone instead of the purple cone.  My mistake!

I bought you a frozen custard at Culver’s … chocolate, of course.  Just how do you get chocolate all over your face?  Do you want a beard like Grandfather has?  Is this so the puppy will give you puppy kisses to wash your face?  You’re certainly happy eating your chocolate ice cream in a waffle cone.

P.P.S.  Grandson: Congratulations on holding your sister for the first time.

Notes to Grandchildren – January 22, 2020

Dear Grandchildren,

My grandson has seen my angry — that incident at Captain’s D’s when I wanted to go in and order and he insisted on going to the drive thru.

I have to work at it … constantly.

For a while I could always tell when my father was angry — he would bite his fist.  Then he stopped.  Without an indicator, he would simply blow up.

I try to find alternatives.  Silence.  Punching bag.  Working out.

You should find alternatives to hurting others with your anger.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 21, 2020

Dear Grandchildren,

Who are you?

Damn, that’s a difficult question to answer.  I’ve been struggling with it for 70+ years … and still working on it.

Strive to be someone.  Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”

Don’t be tedious.  We all know people who are.

Avoid people who steal your life force … your chi.  There are people who like to suck the energy out of a room.

Be yourself.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.”

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 20, 2020

Dear Grandson,

I had fun on our sleep over last night.  My goodness, the things that you can build with rubber bands and dowel rods.  Outstanding!  We watched Duck Tales on Disney+.  You fell asleep on the couch.  You certainly have the makings of a soldier; you can sleep anywhere and in the most awkward positions.  That shall probably be an asset some day.

Follow your dreams.  Begin today.  When you stray from the path, return to it, and resume.

Strike the words “someday I will” and “when I get older” from your vocabulary.  Keep your purpose in mind and work towards achieving it everyday.  Small steps each day bring success.

Love,

Grandfather

P.S. Congratulations on becoming a big brother.  Now you have added responsibilities.  I’m sure that you’ll handle them in an outstanding fashion.  I’ll always love you.

Notes to Grandchildren – January 19, 2020

Dear Grandson,

How happy are you?  I know that your parents and grandparents get concerned that there are times you seem glum.  I guess we expect you to go through life with a smile on your face and a cheerful disposition. (Let me tell you secret — we haven’t.)

We’re wrong.  Each individual is as happy as they resolve to be.  It makes no difference of our station in life, how much money we have, where we live, what schools we attend, or what we do for a living.

The decision to be happy rests solely between our own ears; it’s one of those things that we have complete control over.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 18, 2020

Dear Grandson,

Look seriously at the world.  It’s marvelous!  The changing sky.  Clouds.  Rain.  Snow.  Dirt.  Trees.  Plants.  Animals.  Oceans.  Absolutely everything.  Evidence of the Creator’s hand abounds.  Be thankful that the Creator has permitted us to live in this garden.

We need to protect this world.  It’s not something to be bent to our will but rather a symbiotic relationship wherein all benefit.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 17, 2020

Dear Grandson,

When I was your age, I dreamed of many things.  The places I’d go.  (I dreamed of traveling around the world.)  The things I’d do.  (I dreamed of spending one to three years teaching at various places as I traveled around the world.)  The people I’d meet.  (I dreamed of being part of the everyday life in the places where I taught and avoiding the popular tourist traps.  I’d discover what people were really like.)

Much of it never happened.  (Yes, I became a teacher.  The farthest I got from home was Newport, Rhode Island.)  I was, and still am, very much afraid of life — the events, the people, the places.

I conveniently arranged an unfulfilled life.  I’ve kept quiet.  I’ve stayed in my corner away from the spotlight.

Don’t be like me.  Follow your dreams!

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 16, 2020

Dear Grandson,

Become whatever you want to be.  The power resides within you.  Set a goal and work towards it.

People may not understand.  Friends, family, advisers, mentors, and others may thwart your efforts. Keep going.

Remember that advice is often colored by the thoughts, desires, and perceptions of the person giving it.  They may not want you to succeed.

Love,

Grandfather

P.S. As an example, look at my father (your great-grandfather).  He was born in 1911.  He was raised on a farm with his father (your great great grandfather and his brother).  They raised cattle, pigs, and chickens.  They grew wheat, oats, alfalfa, corn, and soybeans.  They had a garden.  Most of what they ate, they grew or raised.  They worked hard because most of the work was done manually.  Whenever I would ask his advice, I failed to understand his perception.  He wanted a farm just like he had growing up.  He wanted to farm with his sons.  Therefore, his advice was always focused on keeping me close … and on the farm.  One time he even mentioned that his proudest moment was a day all three of us were working ground in the same field.  Oh, the places I could have gone and things I could have seen IF ONLY I had understood his bias.