Notes to Grandchildren – January 23, 2021 (Happiness)

Dear Grandchildren,

Happiness can be found inside you. You will be as happy as you want to be. It’s your perspective.

Do you see the glass as half full or half empty?

Nothing outside of you can solve your problems.

If money was the answer neither lottery winners nor professional athletes would go bankrupt.

If relieving stress through alcohol, prescription drugs, or illicit drugs was the answer would there be a problem with addiction?

Changing locations doesn’t change the person. You can be just as lonely in New York City (or wherever) as you can in Findlay, Ohio.

You can be a dedicated follower of fashion but that doesn’t mean you’ll belong.

The power to be happy, to be contented, to solve problems rests within you.

Focus on your thoughts, your perceptions, and you actions (reactions). Your life will have meaning. You will find everything you seek.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – January 12, 2021 (Happiness)

Dear Grandchildren,

Happiness, however you want to define that, lies within your control.

Happiness rests with those things you have control over — your thoughts, your perceptions, and your actions (reactions).

When I scan The Courier, I usually peruse “Dear Abby” or “Dear Amy.” Hardly a week passes that someone doesn’t write to those advice columns expressing their disappointment at another. The other isn’t doing what the writer wants them to do. The writer wishes to control something external. The writer would be much happier focusing on their thoughts, perceptions and their actions rather than attempting to control others.

Grasp the happiness. It lies within your reach.

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – August 28, 2020 (Happiness)

Dear Grandchildren,

What is happiness? What are the elements of a good life? Does happiness and a good life go together?

Some say more — more material things.

Some reply that it’s family.

Some parrot the words of Tom T. Hall in his song Faster Horses (The Cowboy and the Poet).

Some proclaim the virtues addressed by Henry David Thoreau in Walden: Life in the Woods.

Some repeat some abstract religious doctrine.

Some declare that it’s friends.

Some will refer you to Faith Hill’s The Secret of Life.

No talisman exists for happiness or the good life.

Each of us have our own definition of what constitutes happiness and/or the good life.

For my father (your great grandfather), it was the farm. Working in the dirt, caring for his horses and cattle, repairing equipment contributed to his happiness and meant that his life was good.

Before you came in my life, it was teaching. It wasn’t the lectures. It wasn’t the busy work. It wasn’t the administrative trivia. It was the quickening. It was the discovery. It was the enlightenment of other. It was the caring. It was the appreciating the efforts of my students.

Today, it’s you. Sharing your triumphs. Comforting your defeats. Exploring. Seeing the world anew through your eyes. Hearing about your adventures … and dreams. (I should have committed the same time to Momma when she was your age. I regret that.)

The point is that you get to define these things yourself. Don’t sell out.

What is happiness and a good life to you?

Love,

Grandfather

Notes to Grandchildren – May 7, 2020 (Happiness)

Dear Grandchildren,

This is the 45th day of sheltering-in-place.  Has this become the new normal?

For far too many years I entrusted my happiness to someone or something else.

If only I could be part of this group.

If only this person would be my friend.

If only I had this toy or that car or something else.

If only I could get this job or that promotion.

I was wrong.

Happiness comes from within.

I can’t recall how many times I received what I thought I wanted — that something that would guarantee my happiness — only to say, “Is that all there is?”

Resolve to be happy.  As Helen Keller said, “Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.”

Do good.

Help others.

Find the sunshine behind every dark cloud.

It doesn’t matter

• where you are or
• what you’re doing or
• what’s happening to you or
• what you have or
• what you don’t have.

You control happiness.  It’s totally within your power.  (Oh my, I wish I had known that 60 years ago.)  It’s one of your thoughts … your perceptions … your actions.

Love,

Grandfather